The Game of Secret Ultimatums
by HeartbrokenMisadventure
Summary: "Please, Lily? I – I'll do anything!" "Stop hanging out with those wanna-be Death Eaters." Marauder Era story about how Severus' life would be different if Lily had forgiven him in their fifth year. Very AE.
1. Chapter 1

_**A/N**_: And so begins the longest fanfiction I have written so far – outlined with thirty-three chapters.

**Warnings**: Not very many at all. It's very AE and, as such, Sev develops some OoC tendencies. Implied sex. Mild language. Mild violence. Implied drinking. Time jumps forward in this at no real rate. I have the dates for these, but if there's still confusion, just let me know.

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**Chapter One**

**June 1976**

The corridor was dark and breezy as fifteen year old Severus Snape hurried down it, determined in his plan. Unnoticed by him, portraits eyed him keenly as he passed, wondering just what the pallid Slytherin youth was doing jogging down the hallway towards the Gryffindor common room alone so late at night. Although they were all too familiar with the tension and fighting between the two houses, never before had they seen a single Slytherin or Gryffindor rushing off to confront a large group of the other house. It almost seemed suicidal.

The portrait of the Fat Lady loomed ahead of him and Severus felt his breath catch in his throat. This was it – now or never.

He slowed in front of her, panting, and she gazed down at him curiously. Normally, she would have reprimanded him for being here so late (or yowled for Filch, depending on how much mead she'd drunk) but the gossiper in her was far too intrigued by this odd spectacle in front of her that she didn't even think about chasing him off. "Yes?" she asked.

"I need to speak to Lily Evans," he answered, proud of himself for keeping his voice loud and steady. Well, there was a small squeak, at first, but he doubted that the Lady had heard it.

She frowned, causing her wide face to crinkle in several places. "I'm afraid you're going to have to wait, young man. Lily entered the common room hours ago and everyone else of the House is already inside as well."

Severus felt his shoulders slump and cold disappointment washed through him. This was it – the end of everything. Five years of friendship gone because of one little word . . . No, he thought to himself, raising his head and clenching his jaw. No, he wouldn't allow that to happen. One way or another, he would apologize to Lily for calling her . . . what he'd called her earlier that day.

Perhaps the Fat Lady had seen the determination spark in the youth's black eyes for she said warily, "I'm sorry, but there really isn't anything you can do. Best head off."

Severus shook his head, causing his lank hair to fall into his face. "No. I need to speak with her as soon as possible. I'll wait all night if I have to." And with that, he sat down, leaning against the wall opposite her, and crossed his arms. For a while, she tried to persuade him to leave, come back in the morning. Originally she had found his appearance amusing, but she could get in serious trouble for letting him stay out all night. Depending on what Dumbledore thought, she might even lose her guarding place.

But a firm "no" was all she ever got. Defeated, the Fat Lady bit her lip and let him alone.

The hours passed slowly, each one gradually bleeding into the next. Severus tried to think of ways to keep himself awake; he counted the number of gray stones he could see, sorted his favorite potions ingredients alphabetically in his head, ran different scenarios of how not to get his scrawny arse kicked in the morning by his fellow house-mates, but nothing worked. He could feel his eyes closing . . . his head rolling forward . . .

"_Snivellus_?" a high-pitched voice demanded, startling him awake. "What are you _doing_?"

Severus rose to his feet and licked his dry lips. Mary McDonald, a small, round girl with big blue eyes and curly blonde hair, was a favorite house-mate of Lily's. Although Lily would never go so far as to call them friends, there was definitely affection in her voice when she spoke of Mary.

"I need to speak to Lily."

Mary wrinkled her nose. "Good luck with that. She's not too happy with you."

Severus took a deep breath. "I know. I – I wanted to apologize."

"And you decided to do this by sitting outside the common room?" Severus nodded once and Mary snorted, "Gonna be awfully uncomfortable."

"Well," Severus began slowly, "I was hoping, since, eventually, you're going to have to go back into the common room, you could get her for me? Unless she's sleeping," he backtracked hastily when Mary's eyes widened. "If she's sleeping, then I can just wait -"

Mary eyed him curiously. It was a very odd scrutiny; after all, it had been his friends that had embarrassed her so cruelly. In all honesty, he was surprised that she'd stayed out and talked to him, instead of running for a teacher. "She's not sleeping," she said, still eying him up. "But I can't guarantee she'll talk to you."

"I know."

Mary hesitated before nodding and turning back to the hole. Severus was on tenterhooks: would she come out? Would Mary even tell her he was out here, or would she get back at him by keeping silent?

Finally, after what seemed like lifetimes the portrait swung open (causing the Fat Lady to huff irritably) and Lily crawled out, looking more furious than Severus ever remembered seeing her. She walked over to him, her arms crossed tight, her lips pressed into a thin line (eerily reminiscent of Professor McGonagall), her eyes narrowed into slits as she gazed down coldly at him. For one, wild moment, Severus thought that she would whip her wand out and curse him.

"What do _you_ want?" she asked when she reached him. Her voice was like ice – sharp and cold – and it stung Severus deeply.

"I – I wanted to apologize," he replied cautiously, "for earlier."

"Don't waste your breath," she said. "I'm not going to accept it."

"Lily – I'm sorry! I didn't – It just . . . slipped out. I didn't mean it, I swear! Merlin, I'm so -"

"I really don't care. That's not the kind of thing that just "slips out," Severus." She shook her head. "I keep telling you those friends are no good for you, but you won't listen. You obviously can't see what they're doing to you, and I refuse to sit back and pretend you're not becoming one of _them_. I'm not doing this anymore."

"Please?" Severus Snape fell to his knees, his pale face turned upward in desperation, his dark, stringy hair in disarray. "Please, Lily? I – I'll do anything!" A lesser man – one whom had no idea what he could possibly loose – would have turned away. The hallway was drafty, it was late, and the stone floor was unforgiving on Severus tender knees. But Severus wasn't a lesser man and he knew exactly what was at stake – his best friend.

"But why, Severus? You call everyone of my birth 'mudblood' – I know you do. You don't feel remorse about them. Why should you for me?"

"Oh!" It felt as though a light had lit up somewhere inside him, warming him. He hadn't called any of the other muggle-borns by that name – either to their face or behind their backs. There was a chance he could get her to see that he was serious. "B-but I haven't! Called anyone else m – by that name. Honestly, Lils," he added, grabbing her hand to stop her from turning away when he saw she wasn't convinced. "Honestly, I haven't. Today wasn't – I was hurt. I was hurt and embarrassed and mad that Potter tried to get you to date him like that. And the fact that it was in front of everyone . . ." He swallowed thickly. "It just came out, Lily, honestly. I didn't mean it. I'll prove it!"

A silence settled between the two uncomfortably. There wasn't a sound at all in the hallway – all the surrounding portraits were listening intently, waiting to see what would happen, just as – Severus highly suspected – the Gryffindors were on the other side of the portrait. It was eerie, to have everything depend on what that silence meant. Was she actually listening to him? Did she believe him? Or was she simply waiting for the right moment to drop the ax on their friendship and walk away?

Finally, Lily cocked her head to the side – causing her lush, auburn hair to shift across her face with the movement – and pulled her hands away as she asked, "How?"

"I – um . . . I'll apologize to everyone. The whole school. I'll apologize for what I said to you and for what everyone thinks I said about them. I'll do it first thing in the morning. I'll stand on the staff table, if you want - "

"You don't have to do that." The words were spoken so softly that, at first, Severus wasn't sure he'd heard them correctly.

"What?"

Lily's eyes, usually bright, were dark and serious as she gazed down on him. "You don't have to do that, Sev."

"Well, what then? I'm serious, Lily, you name it and I'll do it."

"Stop hanging out with those wanna-be Death Eaters."

Severus blinked. "That – That's it?" Lily nodded, not taking those emerald eyes off his face. "That's easy! I – Yeah, I can do that. I'll stop. I won't see them anymore, I promise."

Lily took a step back and nodded once, crossing her arms. "Stop and then we'll see."

"It's done, Lily," Severus said, reaching for her hands. She didn't allow him to touch her, though. She took another step back and then turned away completely.

"We'll see, Severus," was all she said before she disappeared into the portrait hole.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: **Thanks to Chromes and bookdiva96 for reviewing!

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**Chapter Two**

The walk back to the Slytherin common room was much longer and quieter, giving Severus ample time to think. There wasn't much that needed to be done to sever ties with the "wanna-be-Death-Eaters" – all he had to do was say he apologized to Lily – but he needed to think of a way to stop them from killing him. They wouldn't accept the fact he had apologized to a "worthless mudblood like Lily Evans."

By the time he'd reached the common room, Severus was no more prepared to deal with Slytherins than he was when he left the portrait of the Fat Lady. Lily had asked a tall order, but Severus wouldn't back down from it. Not if it meant loosing her.

"_Serpent's Tongue_," Severus said lowly to the wall and it slid open ominously.

A small group of Slytherins were huddled in front of the fire, chatting animatedly to one another. Avery, the oldest of the group, looked up when Severus entered. "Oi, Sev!" he called with a grin. "Whatchu doin' out so late?"

Severus gave a shaky smile. "I was apologizing to Lily."

The smile instantly slid from Avery's tan face and his blue eyes widened in anger. "Lily? Lily _Evans_? The _mudblood_ Gryffindor?"

"Don't call her that," Severus said quietly, dangerously.

Avery stood up, quickly followed by Mulciber and Crabbe. Although the latter two teens weren't the brightest of the bunch, they were the largest. Crabbe's forearm was the same width as Severus' whole body. And, while Avery was much smaller and slighter – closer to Severus' size – he was a seventh year, and knew just as many spells as Severus. The trio strode over menacingly, scowls etched on their faces, arms flexed and bulging . . .

"Or you'll do what?" Avery asked, his voice just as low. "Curse me?"

Severus gritted his teeth and told himself that, whatever happened next, would be well worth it if he got to keep Lily. His black eyes burned with a long-forgotten determination to prove himself – prove that he wasn't a coward, wasn't going to back down from this.

"If I have to."

Avery's eyes widened and his mouth curled into a snarl. "Why you two-faced traitor! After all we've done for you, this is how you repay us? By crawling back to that disgusting woman who's barely considered a witch?" He laughed shrilly. "Boy does she have you whipped! It's all you can do, innit? Crawl around after her, making pathetic puppy dog-eyes while she screws - "

Severus wasn't quite sure what happened next. All he knew was the rage inside him – a rage that had started building as soon as the words "two-faced" left Avery's mouth – had peaked. One minute, Avery was snarling and Severus' fists were clenching, and the the next, his fist was in Avery's face.

The room went quiet.

Then, all hell broke loose.

Avery slammed his fist into Severus' jaw, knocking him sideways. Crabbe grabbed Severus by his hair and slammed his head into the cold, stone wall. Something made a sick cracking noise and spots danced in front of Severus eyes, moving in time with the throbbing of his temple. Something warm trickled down the side of his face.

"Bastard!" Avery yelled, one hand pinching his nose. He struck out again, catching Severus on his cheek. There was another crack, followed by blinding pain, and Severus fell to the ground. He lashed out with his legs, catching both Avery and Crabbe off-guard. Crabbe went down – hard. Avery stumbled, but managed to right himself. He snarled a string of profanities and lunged.

Severus reached for his wand and pointed it out towards the other boy. "Stupefy!" he screamed. Avery fell to the floor with a heavy thunk and didn't move.

"What's going on here?" a voice demanded from the hole. Severus turned his head, wincing, and looked into the shocked face of Horace Slughorn, the current head of Slytherin House, standing next to Mulciber, who'd apparently been the one to run and summon him. "You boys have been fighting, haven't you?"

No one answered. Partly because it seemed like such a pointless question – Severus' bloody face and Avery's still body were a dead give away of what had happened. "Haven't you?" Slughorn demanded again, glaring around at all his students. One by one, the Slytherins nodded.

Slughorn huffed. "This had better be the end of it," he threatened. "Off to bed. Now! Except you two," he said, indicated Crabbe, and Severus.

He walked over to Severus and knelt down in front of him, studying his face. "What exactly is the meaning of this? This isn't like you, Snape."

"It was . . . nothing," Severus said quietly, speaking slowly as not to cause any more pain to his already damaged face. "We were just joking and this . . . got out of hand, sir."

"Quite obviously they did, at that," Slughorn said grimly. Severus wanted to chuckle. "All right. Unfortunately, I'm going to have to write all three of you up a detention. But for now, let's get you to Madam Pomfrey." He reached out a hand and helped Severus to his feet before turning to Crabbe and the still unconscious Avery. "It's over – do you understand me?" he demanded, glaring down at Crabbe.

"Yes, sir," the boy replied.

Slughorn nodded. "Good. Well, now, lets see what we can't do about Avery." He pulled out his wand and waved it once. Avery stirred and then groaned. "Help him up to the hospital wing, Crabbe," Slughorn ordered. "I'll help Snape."

"I'm fine, sir, really. You don't need - " Severus began, feeling embarrassed at needing to be helped.

"Nonsense!"

Slughorn put a hand on Severus' shoulders to steady him and the quartet silently headed off to the hospital wing.


	3. Chapter 3

_**A/N:**_ Thanks to Nymma for reviewing!

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**Chapter Three**

The Slytherin common room had been a horrid place for Severus to be the last week of school. He, Avery, and Crabbe had been given detention every night with Slughorn. Severus wasn't sure what Avery and Crabbe's punishment had been – Slughorn had been adamant about keeping them all separated as much as possible – but, judging by the nasty looks and cheap shots Avery had been throwing, it couldn't have been anything good. Luckily, he was never hit where it showed, so there had been no awkward questions from Lily and no interrogations from Slughorn who, as far as Severus could tell, had believed the whole incident to be rough play that had simply gotten out of hand.

Although many of the Slytherins – having witnessed or heard about the fight – had left Severus alone, none of them would come to his defense either. After Crabbe's first detention, Severus had gotten cornered by the larger boy who, in front of three of their housemates, had punched him hard in the gut and called him a "cowardly, worthless piece of shit." By the time the week was up, it was almost a relief to board the Hogwarts Express and head home.

Normally, the Hogwarts Express was a quiet and relaxing way to go home after a long year of magical learning. Everyone was usually dazed after the end of term feast, and exhausted after the end of year exams (and O.W.L.s and N.E.W.T.s for the upper class men). This year, however, the train was abuzz with gossip.

"Did you know?" "Did you hear?" "Did you see?" flew up and down corridors and in and out of compartments. Lily Evans had caused quite a stir when she'd – publicly, no less – forgiven Severus Snape during the end of year feast for calling her that horrid word.

The entire school had been invested in the friendship since they started at Hogwarts. "It'll never work," they scoffed. "A Gryffindor and a Slytherin, best friends? Pishposh. It won't last once those true Slytherin colors come out." And once the 'm' word slipped out, everyone had lined up to tell Lily "I told you so." It had been unthinkable that she forgive Severus. After all, he was well on his way to becoming a Death Eater – the word was just the beginning of a long and dark path.

But Lily hadn't listened to them. She'd forgiven Severus (once he'd really and truly cut ties with his friends) and that was that, as far as she was concerned. There had been, on more than one occasion during the last few days of term, in which she'd been bombarded by members of all houses, asking her if she was crazy. Or cursed. Or under the effect of some potion or other. Every single time Lily replied with a terse, "No, it's none of your business anyway, good day" and then would turn away and head for wherever Severus was. Her reaction, her will to stand by him even through all the whispers and jibes, made Severus realize that it was time.

He had been waiting a long while to ask Lily Evans out, but had never found the right time. But now . . .

Severus sat alone in a compartment, staring absently out the window, trying to think of the right way to ask her to go out on a date. Every way he phrased it in his mind sounded horrible; cheesy, too strong, too demanding, too unsure. Lily deserved the perfect way to be asked out and it was up to Severus to find out what it was.

"Ugh," a high-pitched voice grunted from the doorway. Severus turned his head to see a disgruntled looking Lily Evans standing there.

'_Time's up_,' Severus thought to himself, hoping that he didn't make a complete arse of himself.

Lily slammed the door shut behind her and flung herself into a seat. "I _swear_," she growled, clenching her fists tight, "the next person that asks me if you've slipped me a Befuddling Potion is going to get _hexed_!"

"They still won't let it go?" Severus asked absently, only half aware of the words coming out of his mouth. The rest of his brain was occupied with how adorable Lily looked when she was angry: the way her lips twisted; the way her nose crinkled; the way her tiny, slim hands clenched together.

"No! It's like they all have nothing better to do! 'Oh, you're crazy Evans!' 'Oh, are you dating him, Evans?''Oh, he cursed you Evans!' Gah!" Severus' heart skipped a beat. People thought she was dating him? They thought Lily Evans would actually date _him_? "

"They . . ." Severus cleared his throat and tried again, attempting to keep his voice even. "They think we're dating?"

Lily snorted. "Yes! Isn't it the most ridiculous thing you've ever heard?"

Severus' stomach plummeted. The tone in which she used – the scornful, incredulous tone – cut like knives. "I – "

"I mean," she continued on, not realizing he'd been trying to say something, "We've been friends for years but that's all it's ever been. How they can think that I've thought of _you_ that way – Not that there's anything wrong with you!" she added hastily, misinterpreting Severus' look of pain for one of offense. "It's just – you're my best friend, like a brother." Lily made a disparaging noise in the back of her throat. "Listen to me, venting on about all this when you already know – you feel the same."

The sharp pain in Severus' chest that had started as soon as Lily had said "I don't think of you that way" had intensified. It felt as though white hot pokers were digging in his chest, ripping his heart into tiny pieces and dragging them, slowly, out through his navel. It crushed the air out of his lungs, made it hard for him to concentrate. This couldn't be happening, he thought. It can't, not after . . .

He noticed that Lily was staring at him oddly. Completely unsure of what she'd said or done, Severus just nodded his head and hoped it was the right gesture. It was about all he could do anyway.

Lily smiled. "I knew you did. And I have to say, Sev, I'm so glad for it. It's nice to just sit and talk with a boy without him making a move or me worrying if he's plotting about making a move."

Severus nodded again and bit the inside of his lip. Tears were threatening to over-whelm him, but he refused to cry in front of her, refused to take away her happiness – her happiness of him being "just a friend" and not making a move - to console himself. He couldn't do that to her anyway, no matter how hard he tried.

The train ride dragged on and each second hurt more than the last. It was excruciating for Severus to realize that no matter how hard he tried, no matter what he changed about himself, Lily would only ever think of him as a friend. She would be near, but it would never be in the way he wanted, the way he needed. He wouldn't be the one to give her her first kiss, or take her on her first date. In fact, he'd be forced to watch another man do that, watch another man make his love, his life, his everything happier than he ever could.

A jolt signaled to Severus that the train had reached the platform. He and Lily silently gathered their things and exited. Lily, upon spotting Petunia and her parents, told Severus she'd see him over the weekend and flounced away. Severus watched her disappear, his heart heavy and aching, before turning away to find his mother.

It would have been easier to try and spot his father, Severus thought bitterly to himself. Standing well over six feet tall, with broad shoulders, Tobias Snape was a man hard to miss in a crowd. Unfortunately, he stoutly refused to come unto the platform. ("Why would I want to surround myself with _freaks_?" he always demanded.) Although Severus was glad for the delay in going home, it brought about a hard time trying to find his mother. Eileen Prince was small, barely taller than her fifteen year old son, making it almost impossible to see her over the much larger wizards. Not that it mattered much about her height – she had the kind of face that blended into the background, even when you were looking right at her.

A hand tapped him lightly on the shoulder. Severus turned his head – not wanting to turn all the way around in case it was Potter or one of his minions – and caught sight of his mother's profile. He turned fully around and started at her. She seemed smaller somehow, slighter. At first, Severus irrationally wondered if he'd grown that much over the school year. But then, he caught sight of the bruises around her neck and jaw, despite the black turtle neck and grey scarf she was using to try and hide them.

She offered him a tremulous smile and held out her arms. Severus immediately stepped into her embrace, instantly hating Tobias with every fiber of his being for daring to lay a hand on his mother.

"Mum," he said, stepping back and peering at her intently at her, "are you – "

"I'm fine," she said, brushing him away. "Really, it looks worse than it is." She gave him another smile and grabbed his trunk. "How was school? You hardly wrote at all this year."

Severus clenched his jaw. His mother never wanted to talk about what Tobias did to her, never wanted to leave, or press charges. Every time he beat her she pretended it didn't happen, even going as far as to beg Severus to not say anything. "Let's just keep it in the family, okay?" she'd ask. "It won't happen again."

"Severus," Eileen said, catching his attention. "Not now, please just . . . just let it go."

He was tempted, sorely tempted, to make a scene in public. Maybe, he thought, maybe then someone would realize what was going on. Maybe someone could make it stop . . . He closed his eyes and swallowed thickly. But that would mean letting people know that he couldn't defend himself against an unarmed muggle, couldn't defend himself or his mother. It would mean admitting he was weak and then Lily . . . Lily would definitely leave him.

"School was fine," he said slowly, swallowing back pride and shame. "We had our O.W.L.s this year – that's why I wasn't able to write as much."

"Ah, yes, I'd forgotten you had those fifth year. How do you think you did?"

And so continued the pointless small talk. Severus answered as calmly as he could, all the while raging internally at himself for letting this go on, for not stopping his mother from taking him back there. Back to the distorted man he still managed to call father. Back to the broken house he still managed to call home.


	4. Chapter 4

_**A/N:**_ Thanks to GryffindorAtHeart, Jokegirl, Chromes, and pennypotter128 for reviewing!

**Warnings:** Child abuse, Language

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**Chapter Four**

The taxi cab that Eileen hailed was utterly disgusting – the faux-leather seats were broken and stained with colors Severus hadn't even known existed; everything, from the carpeted floor to the windows were damp; it smelled as if a very large, sweaty man had left his cloths under the seats for a fortnight. But Severus didn't complain – he knew his mother disliked is as much as he did, but they had little choice.

The Prince family was a rich, pure-blood family. His grandmother, Isadora, had never worked a day in her life and his grandfather, Hirum, had retired early. They had, for as long as Severus could remember, owned seven large, luxurious houses, wore expensive clothes and jewelry, and had hired help to do everything for them. The maids and butlers (Isadora had utterly refused to have "verminous little elves running about the place") jobs fell just short of bathing and tying shoes. However, the Prince's had taken their youngest daughter off the will. Not because she'd married a muggle, as so many pure-blood families complained of, but because she'd married an abusive drunk.

That left his mother with nothing. Tobias refused to let her work – or drive – and he barely made enough to support them. Severus had tried to work odd-end jobs – cutting lawns, walking dogs – but they never stuck. Nobody trusted the drunk man's son.

"So," Eileen said, still trying to diffuse the tension in her son, "how did Lily's exams go?"

Severus shrugged, staring absently out the window. "Alright."

This year was going to be different, he vowed. He was sixteen now, and more than able to get a real job. It would have to be somewhere out of town, as to get out from under Tobias' dark shadow. Perhaps a local store down in the wizarding village? There was an apothecary that had just opened last summer. . .

The ride wasn't very long – made all the more shorter by Severus' desire to be anywhere else. They were already in front of Spinner's End before Severus could fully decide on the places he would apply at first. Seeing the tiny, cobbled row house pushed all those thoughts out his mind. It was hard to dream of extra money, having fun, being happy when faced with the nasty little house he had loathed for his entire life.

Being home meant a lot of things that Severus didn't want to think about: hunger, thirst, having to share an outside bathroom with the neighbors. It meant having to hide in his room when his father went drinking; having to wait on him hand and foot the next morning while he was hung over; having to cook, clean, and shop on top of summer homework. In short it meant captivity - loosing his freedom.

The curtains – a disgusting green color – were thrown open, allowing the faint light from the table lamp to spill out of the window and unto the brown, dead grass below. It seemed, Severus thought, tilting his head back to stare at the second floor, that this was the only room to have a light on. The rest of the windows were dark. He hoped that this meant Tobias was already asleep, but he seriously doubted his luck was that good.

Eileen grabbed Severus' ruck-sack while he grabbed his trunk and, together they headed into the still house. The door creaked open ominously and loudly – much louder than Severus ever remembered it being – to reveal an empty sitting room. His heart-rate instantly picked up. Something about this was off; it was too quiet, too peaceful, too still.

"I wonder where your father is," Eileen asked, frowning, before calling out for him.

"In the kitchen!" the harsh, angry voice of his father called out. Heavy footsteps followed the words and, far too soon for Severus' liking, his father was standing in the archway separating the two rooms. His broad shoulders barely squeezed through the gap, making him look far more intimidating as he glowered down at his son.

"So!" he barked, crossing his arms over his barrel chest. "_So_! Not only are you a magical freak who can't follow the rules at home, but you also can't follow the rules when you go to your school." He thrust a piece of parchment in Eileen's face, keeping his gaze locked on Severus. "Your headmaster wrote and told us you've gotten into two fights within the last two weeks."

Eileen's dark eyes widened and she looked up at her son. "Is this true?"

"I – Kind of - "

Tobias snorted. "'Kind of'? You were 'kind of' fighting?"

"I – t-he last one wasn't a fight," Severus stuttered, feeling anxious. "We – we were playing and it just . . . got out of hand."

Tobias curled his lip in a snarl. "Do you know what I think? I think you're a dirty little liar. I think you _were_ fighting and you're trying to save your sorry hide by lying through your teeth. That shit may have worked on your headmaster, but I'm a little smarter than a dip-shit with a wand. I know when you're lying to me and I know you're lying to me now!"

"I'm - "

_CRACK_

The blow came from no-where, catching Severus across the cheek and making his head snap to the side. Tears welded in his eyes uncontrollably as the sting instantly set in. Severus bit hard into his lip to stop from crying out.

"Tobias!" Eileen cried, but he ignored her.

"Now, you listen to me you little scrote!" he snapped, reaching out and grabbing Severus by a lank of hair and pulling. The jerking motion forced Severus to his knees, and tilted his head back at an awkward, painful angle. "Do _not_ lie to me or there will be hell to pay! Do you understand me?"

Severus forced his "yes sir" out between gritted teeth and Tobias let him go, ignoring Eileen's protests. Severus painfully straightened himself up, trying to ignore the throbbing on the back of his head and the stinging in his cheek. He could feel his face burning with shame.

"Get!"

The word sent him scrambling to his room, hating both himself and his father simultaneously. Had be been stronger, been more courageous, or quicker, or smarter, he would have been able to stop that embarrassing incident from occurring. As he reached his room, he couldn't help but think that Potter and Black wouldn't have stood for that. They would have attacked back.

The screaming of his parents made it impossible for Severus to get any semblance of sleep. He could hear every word, every hit, every stomp. Sometimes they argued about him (it was on those occasions that Tobias would smack Eileen), sometimes they argued about money (which made his already irate father storm around), and they argued about each other. It continued for hours; each of them taking their turn to blame the other for their miserable lives, their miserable son (who was exactly like the other), their miserable house in this miserable town filled with miserable jobs. They finally settled down when the sun came up.

Severus curled into a ball and squeezed his eyes shut. No more, he vowed. No more of this. This summer was going to change. He wouldn't be the scrawny little git who couldn't stand up for himself, who let people walk over him, dictate him. He wasn't going to turn into Tobias, or spend the rest of his life in fear of him and becoming him. He would get a job – a good job, one that he could be proud of. He would start a family and do everything to make them happy, to make sure they had what they needed. And he would do it without raising his voice or his hand.

He was going to prove to the world that he wasn't his father.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N:** Thanks to Little Hana-Chan, pennypotter128 (who was also my tenth reviewer!), Very Small Prophet, and ARMYstrongFANtom for reviewing!

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**Chapter five **  
1 September 1976

The Welcoming Feast had been awkward, to say the least: the Slytherins hadn't, despite the summer holidays, gotten over what they saw as Severus' "betrayal." They had taken up the entire compartment, effectively blocking him out of the Slytherin portion of the train; shoved him towards the back of the group of students, so they wouldn't have to share a carriage with him; sat as close together as possible at the front of the table, making him sit alone at the end. They refused to speak to him, and looked at him – with contempt and malice, no less – only when necessary.

But, if Severus was honest, it was welcome. After a long, brutal summer of staying under the watchful eye of his father, and a horrid end of fifth year, being ignored wasn't nearly as bad as being noticed. Also, it served to prove, once and for all, to Lily that he wasn't ever going to become a Death Eater – he no longer had ties to those people.

Once the desserts were consumed, the feast crawled to a stop. Dumbledore, the headmaster, rose to his feet cheerily. Severus hadn't had many dealings with him, but those few occasions had given Severus enough of a glimpse of the Headmaster's true personality for Severus to decide he didn't like him. Dumbledore was an odd, irritating, cocky man who seemed to know everything. Oh, he was nice enough. But he'd get this twinkle in his eye whenever something would come up, this light that seemed to say "I knew this was going to happen, but it's okay, I have it under control" and "I am so glad I'm right" all at once.

"Welcome!" his deep voice boomed around the Great Hall, "to another year at Hogwarts! I hope many of you had a pleasant holiday," his blue, twinkling eyes swept around the room. "As usual, Mr. Filch has asked me to remind you all that magic is not, for any reason, to be used outside the classroom. This includes duels, practicing homework, and transfiguring the lavatory door into a giant niffler." His blue eyes glanced sharply at the Dynamic Duo – Black and Potter – who were, almost assuredly, responsible for that particular incident.

Severus rolled his eyes and ground his teeth. Filch had been caretaker for only a few short years (he'd started during Severus' first year) but he'd already made enemies among many of the students. He was a strict man, who, as a squib, often used intimidation to make up for his lack of magic. When that didn't work, he ran to Dumbledore who, more often than not, smiled and shooed him away. It was not the man's constant complaints of magic in the corridors that had caused the reaction in Severus – it was his class-mates reaction: tittering, laughing, and telling nasty jokes. They seemed to think that being a squib, being unable to use magic, was a choice. Something that Filch had chosen to be. It was, in all honesty, ridiculous and closed minded. Not one of them knew what it was like, to be trapped in a space where magic was needed but unable to reach it.

Dumbledore finished his speech –seemingly oblivious to the giggling students – and sent them all off to bed. Severus rose slowly, trying not to attract attention. While his house-mates had ignored him so far, Severus didn't want to take the chance that one wrong move would have them turn on him faster than the serpents that represented their house. No, better fly under the radar as much as possible.

He managed to lose himself in the throng of students. Normally, he would have gone to Lily's side, but he thought it too much a risk tonight. The Slytherin's would surely notice him with the muggle-born and, just as surely, skin him alive for it. All the way to the dungeons, he rode on the waves of students, always being careful to have to student in front of him and one behind. Eventually, though, it became all Slytherins.

"Snape," an angry voice sounded from behind him. Severus tried hard not to flinch as he turned around to look at Avery. To say the boy looked furious would be an understatement: his eyes were narrowed and a vein was pulsing in his forehead.

"Have a nice summer?" Avery asked, his voice full of faux-politeness. He didn't wait for Severus to respond, instead continuing on. "I didn't, you know. You see, Slughorn told Dumbledore about our little," he paused for a moment, seeming to think about the right word," _misunderstanding _. Seemed to think we were fighting."

This didn't surprise Severus. After all, Dumbledore had written to his own father and his lack of reaction seemed to anger Avery even further.

"Got punished for it. My parents took my wand, made me do my homework in the kitchen while they were looking over my shoulder. I wasn't allowed out or to owl any of my friends." He sneered down at Severus. "All because of you."

A crowd was gathering now, called by the smell of tension and anger that surrounded the two boys. This time was different though – many of the students were tense themselves. The Slytherins were a proud bunch, and Avery's temper was certainly having a harmful effect on their image. But they were also afraid; Avery was a good fighter and was almost constantly backed by Mucliber and Crabbe. He was, in a way, their leader, and they were hesitant to rebel against him.

"I didn't – " Severus began to protest, but Avery cut him off by grabbing the front of his robes and hauling him forward.

"Slughorn!" a new voice sounded out, sounding wary. Avery instantly let go of Severus and whipped his head toward the voice.

"What?"

The crowed parted slightly to reveal who had spoken; Regulus Black was standing toward the back of the group, standing sideways in order to both watch the spectacle and keep an eye on something down the hallway.

"Slughorn's coming." And, sure enough, their professor was waddling towards them, looking interested in the large group. Avery gave Severus a nasty glare, and then headed off to the common room, his "gang" following obediently behind. The rest soon followed, leaving Severus and Regulus alone.

"Everything all right? What's going on, boys?" Slughorn asked as he reached them.

"Nothing sir. Mook just forgot the password to the common room, sir," Regulus replied, his voice innocent and light. Slughorn studied the two boys for a moment, and then seemed to buy the excuse. He nodded to the pair, and continued on his way.

Regulus glanced over at Severus, his expression cloudy and unreadable, before brushing past him and heading into the common room, leaving Severus alone.


	6. Chapter 6

_**A/N:**_ Thanks to excessivelyperky and pennypotter for reviewing!

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**Chapter Six**

The great hall was noisy as Severus sat down for breakfast, alone, on the far end of the Slytherin table. He was getting used to this routine: get up early – earlier than his house-mates – shower and dress quietly, and sit on his bed with the curtains closed around him, wand clutched in his hand. He'd listen as everyone else rose and got ready. Occasionally, someone from Avery's group (a minority group, now that Slytherin was in the bottom running for the House Cup due to their behavior) would taunt him from the other side of the emerald drapes, but rarely did anything come of it. Usually, the person would just grow bored of his silence and head out. Once the dorm was empty, Severus would slowly, cautiously, leave for the Great Hall where he would sit alone, eat quickly, and be the first one from his table to leave his seat. Then, he'd walk cautiously through the halls, keeping an eye out for Avery's gang (they liked to attack when there was no one around to witness it) or James and his band of thugs. More often than not, it would be the latter who would come at him; jinxes to make him trip, drop his books, shred his homework. He'd fight back – when he could. It always seemed that there was an enemy Slytherin around when he tried and, although they had finally stood up to Avery about physically attacking him, he was still not very favored and they tried any excuse to get him in trouble. Not very much, of course. Never enough to take any of the dwindling points away, but enough to let Severus know that he was alone. That he had no friends to help him.

He'd developed a habit of simply clenching his jaw and dealing. He bared the brunt of the Slytherin's hate, bared the torment and shame of allowing them to have the upper-hand. There was nothing else he could really do: it was too late to make amends with his house-mates and, anyway, doing so would just make Lily think he was turning back to his old ways. So he clenched his jaw, kept silent, and hated himself.

It was one thing to have this behavior at home, away from prying eyes that could use his weakness against him, when he could wallow in shame and misery alone. But here, where everyone was watching, it was becoming harder and harder to stay the silent endurer.

He was tired of it.

Charms class – which was always the worst class of the day – dragged on even more slowly than usual. They were learning Avis Charms, something Severus had taught himself fourth year, so he spent majority of the class thinking.

He knew just as many spells as Avery – and more than Potter – and he'd successfully invented three so far. If they would ever come at him in a one-on-one duel, he'd easily be able to defend himself. Perhaps, he mused, that's _why_ they always ganged up on him.

"All right, class," the little voice of Professor Flitwick piped up, dragging Severus away from his bitter thoughts. "Time's up. Now, show me what you've done!"

Most of the attempts were abysmal. David Howie – a fellow Slytherin – somehow managed to stick Flitwick's desk to the ceiling. Annabella Sturr – a Hufflepuff – whipped her wand in a random pattern and turned the girl sitting next to her purple. By the time Flitwick reached Severus at the back of the room, he looked almost fearful.

"Your turn, Mr. Snape," he said, his voice squeakier than usual.

Severus allowed himself a small grin before twisting his wand in the appropriate pattern, and muttered the charm. A small flock of yellow birds burst from his wand and fluttered around the room.

"Oh!" Flitwick exclaimed happily. "Well done Mr. Snape, well done! Ten points to Slytherin!"

David, who hadn't been able to perform the spell correctly, glared darkly at him. Severus made note. David wasn't part of Avery's gang, and he usually left him well alone, but Severus didn't need any more enemies and Avery didn't need any more reasons to attack him. He'd have to be more careful about showing up his class-mates.

Severus gathered his belongings slowly as the bell rang, stuck in the habit of being the last one out of the classroom. He was still debating with – or rather, convincing – himself about standing up to Avery again. There were pros and cons to each, of course. The problem was trying to figure out which ones outweighed which. Or which ones had consequences he could live through, at least.

"Severus!" a familiar feminine voice called out as soon as he left the classroom. "Sev!" Severus paused and allowed Lily to catch up to him. "Hey!" she greeted him, face flushed from the cold air.

"Hey," he smiled at her, his worries momentarily gone now that she was by his side. "How was Herbology?"

Lily shrugged. "Not bad, although Lupin wasn't in class, so I had to do my Drubegga project by myself."

"Lupin wasn't there, huh?" Severus asked slyly.

"Ugh, Severus, don't even – "

But it was too late. "You don't think it's the least bit strange that he's sick at _every full_ moon? That he _leaves the grounds_ then?"

Lily stopped walking. "He's not a werewolf."

Severus was very tempted to keep pointing out these facts – and to bring up the story of Black tricking him to meet Lupin – but her murderous glare stopped him. He hastily changed the subject and the two continued their walk, heading for the library as they usually did when they had free time.

The library was empty – as it usually was this time of day – what with everyone outside, enjoying the last vestiges of warm fall air. But that was the way Severus liked it. The library was a safe-haven for him. Here, under the watch-full eye of Madam Pince, blocked from sight by the tall shelves of books, he was safe. The hard part was convincing Lily to spend her time indoors with him. His pride wouldn't let her know about the goings-on with the Slytherins (or the incident with Black) and her naturally energetic personality wouldn't let her stay inside for very long. She often times got irritated as his flimsy excuses but, for once, Severus didn't care. This was as much for her safety as his – there was no doubt in his mind that his housemates would attack her to get to him.

The day passed merrily. Lily and Severus spent their free-time laughing and giggling and gossiping about the latest news of their classmates. In between that – when he had classes – his tormentors left him alone. Only Avery seemed to notice his existence but, aside from some cat-calls, nothing came of it. Potter and his band of morons seemed focused on easier quarry and they, too, left him alone. It gave him hope that maybe – just maybe – his life was turning around.

He dropped Lily off at the Gryffindor portrait (the Fat Lady eyed him warily, as she often did when he strolled down the corridor) just before curfew, unable to rid himself of the stupid grin plastered across his face. For the first time in months, he headed to his own common room with a spring in his step, head held high, and without looking around every corner.

The last of the stragglers were just reaching the common room at the same time Severus did. Some of them, like Regulus Black, putzed around outside, laughing and joking with friends. Others, like Mucliber, headed straight inside, trying to exhibit good behavior. Severus had planned on being one of the one who skulked around –although this was more to limit his time with his housemates than anything – when a hand on his shoulder caught his attention. Severus turned around, surprised, and came face-to-face with James Potter.

Severus narrowed his eyes.

"Hi," Potter said uncomfortably. "I was wondering – can we talk? Just for a minute?" He didn't wait for a response, instead just continued on. "Look, I never got a chance to apologize for that prank Sirius pulled on you last year. The one with the Shrieking Shack," he clarified. "It was good of you not to rat us out, mate. We weren't supposed to tell anyone about Remus."

"I didn't do it for you," Severus snapped. "Do you have any idea how much trouble _I_ would have gotten into? I'm not one of Dumbledore's Golden Boys – I don't get away with everything. I was still out of bounds – way out of bounds - passed curfew."

Potter nodded, although Severus doubted he'd actually heard a word. "So you didn't tell Li – anybody?"

Severus stared. "I know you mean Lily when you say 'anybody.' You're asking if I told Lily." Severus took Potter's silence as conformation. "No. No, I haven't told Lily. Yet."

Potter's look when from uncomfortable to angry. "You can't tell her!" he snapped.

"Why not? She has a right to know."

"No. It's up to Remus to decide who knows and who doesn't."

"Black doesn't seem to think so."

"Damn it!" Potter clenched his hands into fists. "This isn't about Sirius! This isn't even about me! It's about Lily and Remus. What Sirius did was wrong – why the bloody hell do you think I stopped him?" This time, Severus stayed silent. Potter sighed in frustration and ran his fingers through his already untidy black hair. "Look, I know you hate me – and you have pretty good reason to – and my friends. But this isn't about that. This is about Lily's safety. She can't know about what happened. I swear – Remus isn't dangerous as long as he's kept away from humans after the change."

"But you sneak out with him."

"Yeah…"

"What do I get out of this?" Severus asked abruptly. "If Lupin really isn't dangerous, then it doesn't matter. Lily isn't going to go looking for him during a full-moon – she's a little smarter than that – so there's no danger of him hurting her."

Severus knew Potter's entire excuse was bull. For one, if Potter was really worried about Lily's safety, he would have come to Severus sooner and found a way to silence him. For another, the incident happened more than a year ago, so there was no issue of them getting into trouble – how could they, when they hadn't gotten caught? So why was Potter worried now?

"'Get'?"

Severus nodded. "This is big news – you're friend tried to feed me to a dangerous werewolf who's going to regular classes. I need to protect my fellow students, you see."

Potter narrowed his eyes and thought it over. "What do you want?"

Severus simply cocked his head to the side, and kept silent.

A heavy silence settled between them while Potter wracked his brains trying to figure out what Severus could possibly want from him.

"Convincing Peter and Sirius to leave you alone is going to take some work," Potter said slowly, "but I think I could get them to agree."

"How very kind of you," Severus said dryly. "Really. But that's not what I want. What I want," he paused and looked Potter right in the eye, "is for you to stay away from Lily. She doesn't like you. Back off."

Potter's gaze widened, although whether it was from Severus' request or his tone Severus couldn't tell. "So you'll stay quiet if I back off of Lily?"

Severus nodded and Potter looked him up and down in appraisal. "How very Slytherin of you." Potter's tone was empty and Severus was having a hard time figuring out what was going on in the boy's head. "All right," Potter said finally, still in that strange tone. "All right. I'll back off in my pursuit of Lily and you don't tell anybody about what happened."

"It's a deal," Severus replied, keeping his own tone as neutral as possible. There was no doubt in his mind that Potter would break his word first chance he got. But that didn't matter – whether he realized it or not, Potter had let something slip. Something Severus could use against him.

Potter nodded and headed back the way he had come and Severus turned toward the common room. Regulus Black was still outside, his gaze dark and unreadable as ever as he watched Severus approach.

"I hope you have a back-up plan," he said, "'cause Potter's gonna screw you first chance he gets."

Severus scowled. "I'm well aware of that, not that it's any of your business."

Regulus just shook his head before muttering the password and heading into the common room. Severus followed suit, hoping that his theory was right but, more importantly, that he'd never have to put it to the test.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven**

The Great Hall was abuzz as Severus entered the next morning. At first, he paid no mind – there was always some "interesting" gossip that faded to the back of everyone's mind in a matter of hours. Although this news seemed extra special (a few courageous Hufflepuffs were sitting at the Slytherin table gossiping). Severus wrote it off as the usual trash. Perhaps SloppyMolly – the latest popular musical group – had blown up the stage. Or perhaps some greedy money grubber was claiming to be the long-lost relative of some really famous person. Either way, it didn't matter to him. He had never cared for gossip.

"I heard her clothes had been found six miles south of what was left of her body," a young Slytherin told his friend.

Severus' ears perked up involuntarily. A body was found?

"Ugh!" the friend shuddered. "My Da always told me they were monstrous creatures but this…" she shivered again. "Ugh!"

The boy nodded importantly. "I know. And to think – all those times people warned us about werewolves in the Forest! I thought it was a joke!"

"Werewolf?" Severus asked in spite of himself. Someone had been attacked by a werewolf? In the Forrbidden Forest?

Apparently this news was big enough for the Slytherins to forget about Severus' ostracization. "Yep, it was in the paper this morning," the boy answered, holding up the latest edition of the Daily Prophet. "They found her clothes just beyond the boundaries of Hogwarts, shredded. So, the Aurors sent out a search party and found pieces of a body right on the border of Hogwarts. They're thinking some girl from Hogsmeade wandered too close to a werewolf."

Severus had gone very still. A werewolf attack almost on Hogwarts grounds, where a werewolf was currently attending, masquerading as a student? He inadvertently glanced over at the Gryffindor table. Black, Potter, and Pettigrew (Lupin was conspicuously missing) were sitting together, laughing as Potter made his goblet dance up and down the table.

So much for "safe werewolf." Suddenly, Severus crack the other night about "I need to protect my fellow students" didn't seem so glib.

Severus had expected Dumbledore to address the school and he wasn't disappointed. The headmaster started his speech by acknowledging that a girl, had in fact, been attacked, and the Aurors felt strongly that it was made by a werewolf. He then went on to say that the Forbidden Forest was off limits – no exceptions! – and sent them off to class.

"Guess they still haven't found the wolf," the Slytherin girl muttered as she rose from her seat. The boy grunted in agreement.

Severus turned his focus back to the Gryffindors. Pettigrew and Black were still sitting, seemingly lost in their own conversation. Potter, however, had leapt from his seat and grabbed Lily by the arm. She seemed surprised, but not altogether upset to have been accosted by Potter. They talked for a minute – flirted, really – and headed out of the Hall together. Severus gritted his teeth. So much for the agreement!

Snarling, Severus pushed himself to his feat, determined to speak with Dumbledore, and stalked out.

"So is Remus going to be in class?" he heard Lily – who was apparently headed in the same direction as himself – ask. "I noticed he wasn't at breakfast."

Potter chuckled and the sound made Severus involuntarily clench his fists. "Yes. You're elusive Herbology partner shall be there today. He was in the Library during breakfast – catching up."

"You know," Lily said, her voice light, "he's sick an awful lot." Severus slowed his walk, his curiosity piqued again. Lily had never seemed to take notice to Lupin's absences – at least not enough to comment on it like this.

"Mmm."

"What's wrong with him?"

"Nothing," Potter said, his voice _too_ full of innocence. "Nothing's wrong with him."

"Well, it is rather strange," Lily continued, "him being sick so often. It seems like he's sick every month."

"Does it?"

"Actually, come to think of it, he _is_ sick every month…"

"Are implying something?" The light, innocent tone Potter had been using vanished in an instant. Now there was a hard edge, almost like a warning. "What are you saying?"

Lily stopped and stared at Potter, who was still beside her, his head turned slightly in her direction. Although Severus was behind the pair and couldn't see their faces, he knew Lily enough to assume she was looking at Potter defiantly. "That I think Severus might be right."

_Ha_!

"Snivellus!" Potter spat. "And what does he know?"

"He's made some pretty good points." Lily said, her voice low. "Remus _is_ always sick during the full moon and he _does_ leave the school during that time."

Potter didn't say anything.

"Look," Lily said, her voice terse. "It doesn't matter to me – really. I know Remus, and I know he wouldn't hurt me. But Severus doesn't know him like that and after what happened – "

"What happened?"

"You know very well," she snapped. "A werewolf attack practically on Hogwarts grounds? A werewolf who's going to Hogwarts? He can put two and two together. I'd be willing to be that Severus is on his way to Dumbledore right now."

"It won't matter," Potter spat through clenched teeth. "Who's going to believe him? As far as Dumbledore knows, Remus never leaves his spot during his transformation. He's not stupid – Dumbledore knows how Snape feels about us. He's just going to assume the greasy little git is trying to stir up trouble."

Severus took a step back, stung. As much as he hated to admit it, Potter was right. There was too much animosity between the Gryffindors and Slytherins for any teacher to take Severus seriously. Unless he had some undeniable proof, they would brush it off as slander. On the off chance that a teacher _did_, for some reason, believe him, they'd bring in Potter, Black, Pettigrew, and Lupin in for questioning. And, in the end, it would be their word (for there was no doubt in his mind that they would all proclaim Lupin innocent) against his. It was a lost cause.

Unless…

Unless Severus could find some sort of proof. Something that linked Lupin, unquestionably, to this girl.

Severus was no trained Auror. He was no good at snooping for clues and, anyway, all the clues would be in the Forest and he had no desire to go in there. If Lupin wasn't the werewolf, than that meant that some _other_ wolf was running around eating people. A wolf that was currently at large.

No, his proof would have to come from somewhere else. But where…?

Unable to come up with anything on his own, Severus headed to the library. Maybe there was a potion he could brew – a spell to cast, something that he hadn't stumbled across that could help him.

At first, Severus thought the library was empty (which would make sense, as everyone else would be in class) but, as he headed farther back, he was shown to be wrong. Lupin was still there, bent over a piece of parchment, surrounded by open books, apparently completely unaware that he was no longer alone.

A sudden bolt of inspiration hit him. Lupin would be the best evidence to prove his case. If the wolf admitted to the attack, there would be nothing to it. No way for Potter and the rest to turn the tide in their favor, or to use the excuse of "stirring up trouble" to get out of it.

And hadn't Potter hinted that Lupin was the weak link? "It would be hard for me to convince Sirius and Peter to lay off…" Sirius and Peter, but not Remus? Severus could remember every time Potter jumped him, humiliated him, teased him, bullied him and he could probably count on one hand the amount of times Lupin had actually been involved. It was a good implication that Lupin didn't get the enjoyment out of torturing him that his friends did. Lupin wasn't nearly as cold hearted as the rest. And if Lupin could easily be swayed to leave Severus alone – a Slytherin that he didn't particularly like – it wouldn't be hard at all to convince him to admit the attack.

"Can I help you with something?" Lupin asked irritably, snapping Severus out of his thoughts.

"Actually," Severus said coolly, "I think you can."

To say Lupin looked surprised was an understatement. The boy actually rocked backward in his chair. "Are you serious? With what?"

"I think you already know."

Lupin gave him a funny look and returned to the hunched position he normally had. "Erm, no. If I did, I wouldn't have asked you 'with what?'"

Severus laid his hands on the table and looked Lupin right in the eye, trying to calm his nerves. This was a very delicate procedure and many people's safety depended on it. If he said something wrong…

"I already know, Lupin. I figured it out."

Lupin's face paled considerably, but he didn't admit anything. His voice was calm as he replied, "Figured what out?"

"You know very well what." But Lupin refused to budge. Severus took a deep breath and, trying not to think about the fact that there was every possibility he was going to severely anger a possible murderer, said "I know you're a werewolf.

He'd expected Lupin to gasp, to exclaim "how did you know!" in aghast. But he didn't. His face simply paled more, and he clenched his hands together. "How?" Then he shook his head. "No. No, I know how – you're too observant not to notice my absences always coincided with the full moon and too smart not to know what that meant."

"Although I have some surprise – I'd expected you to have said something before now. If not to me then to James or someone. It would be the perfect leverage to get them to leave you alone. No one else is supposed to know about this, you see."

Now it was Severus' turn to look confused. "They already know that I know – they've known for a while. And, considering the little prank they pulled two years ago, I don't think they really care that I know."

"Prank?"

Severus frowned. "Yes. Prank." Lupin blinked. "The one with the Shrieking Shack…"

Lupin's face remained blank and he stared at Severus for a long time before asking, "Why are you telling me this?"

"Because I know about the girl too," Severus said, struggling like mad to keep calm: Lupin's face had, in a matter of seconds, gone from completely emotionless to filled with rage.

"I didn't have anything to do with that!" he growled.

"Look, I'm sure it was an accident," Severus said, not believing a word of what he was saying, but feeling to need to placate the wolf – who was now shaking – before he did something dangerous. "You snuck out of the shack and she got too close – "

"_I didn't touch that girl_!" Lupin shouted, baring his teeth. He heaved himself up –causing Severus to flinch – and glared down. "Look, Snivellus," he sneered venomously, "I get that you hate James and Sirius. But they aren't evil – they wouldn't have let me hurt anybody. And, anyway, we didn't even leave the shack the other night." He shoved his books and parchments into his bag and swung it wildly over his shoulder. "So piss-off about your little theories. Some other wolf got that girl." And then he stormed out, leaving Severus feeling very confused and shaken.

***  
The rest of the school year passed by in a blur. Although Potter had broken his word (several times over) Severus didn't have it in him to break his. He wasn't entirely sure that Lupin wasn't at fault for the attack, but this little nagging voice in the back of his brain kept insisting that he'd gotten it wrong – that Lupin wasn't at fault at all. Since there was no evidence to the contrary and the Aurors hadn't arrived to speak to Lupin (Dumbledore wouldn't have turned a blind eye if he thought at all that Lupin would be at fault…would he?) Severus was forced to let the matter drop.

Lupin seemed to have taken the news of Black's prank hard. It was the norm now to see him by himself, hunched over some piece of parchment or another. He looked miserable. Although Lupin had every right to know what had happened (Severus assumed that Lupin had interrogated his friends and gotten the full story) he had seemed a lot happier being oblivious. Severus couldn't help but feel a twinge of guilt whenever he saw Lupin sitting alone. Perhaps it was because knew exactly what he felt like. After all, Severus himself was alone.

Lily had managed to regain the friendship of the other Gryffindor girls and it was a fairly common occurrence for her to spend all day with them. As a matter of fact, the morning of the End of Year Feast, Lily had approached him and informed him that she'd be with "the girls" on the train ride home. Severus had smiled tightly, forcedly, and told her that it was quite alright.

It really actually wasn't, Severus reflected as he searched for an empty compartment on the train. He'd hardly gotten to spend any time with Lily these past few weeks and he'd been looking forward to their annual train ride home. He sighed heavily and, finally finding a compartment, flung the door open and plopped down on the seat.

He was given a few precious moments to mope like the surly teenager he was, before the door was opened again.

"Mind of I sit here? There's nowhere else." Severus lifted his head and looked up into the face of one Remus Lupin.

"Sure," he muttered, pushing himself into a sitting position. Lupin gave him a nod of thanks and took a seat next to the window.

"I'm sorry," Severus blurted, unable to contain himself. "For what I said…"

"It's alright," Lupin said tersely, not looking at him. "I can't say I wouldn't have come to any different conclusion, had I been you."

Severus shifted uncomfortably, unsure of what to say to that, and the two sat in silence for the rest of the train ride.

***  
Eileen wasn't at the platform when Severus got off the train. He sighed heavily and silently thanked Merlin that he had a few pounds on him. He'd be able to call a cab – as unappealing as that sounded – instead of being forced to walk all the way back to his house.

The cab ride wasn't as bad as the last time. At least this cab looked to have been cleaned recently (Severus tried not to think of why that was) and smelled very faintly of pine. There was even a seatbelt.

The sun was just setting as the cab pulled up the curb. Severus got out slowly – not in any hurry to face his father – slowly unloaded his belongings, paid the cab driver the exact amount, and slouched up the front steps.

"Mum!" he called when he entered. "I'm home!"

His mother poked her head around the corner. Her eyes were blood-shot and she looked thinner, but it was a fairer sight than last time. "Hi, sweetie," she said with a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes. "I was just fixing dinner." No apologizes for not being there to get him, no explanations. Severus sighed heavily again as he walked into the kitchen. So it was going to be one of _those_ nights.

"What did you make?"

"Shepherd's pie. It's just about finished."

Severus eyed her suspiciously. Shepherd's pie was his favorite dish. But, as lamb was so expensive, he rarely ever got it. The fact that she was making it tonight raised a few flags.

"And what's the occasion?"

Eileen raised her eyebrows, trying to look surprised, as she pulled plates from the heavily scarred cupboards above the sink. "No occasion. I just felt like making it."

Severus didn't believe her, but he let it go and helped her set the table. Dinner was served.

"So," Eileen asked, "how was school?"

"All right."

She smiled and ate some more. "You know," she said suddenly, as if she'd just had this epiphany. "You're old enough to get a job."

Severus blinked. "Yes, I've been thinking about getting one."

"Oh? Any ideas where yet?" She didn't wait for an answer before saying. "They just opened a new grocer's about two blocks away. They're hiring."

Severus nodded slowly. "So is the new apothecary that just opened in Hogsmeade. Jeebs, the owner, is looking for someone to take inventory, handle orders, and stock the shelves."

"Hogsmeade? And how would you get there every day?"

"I could floo," he said slowly. "Or. Well, Jeebs offered the flat above the store…"

Eileen paused. "I think it would be better if you were…closer to home. And – And I think your father would like it much more if you worked at the grocers."

Severus clenched his jaw. "You mean he'd like it better if I was more muggle."

"Severus!"

Severus shook his head and shoveled more food into his mouth. The meal had been delicious at first – now that he was older, Eileen hadn't been so careful with the wine – but now it was bland. "To be honest, mother," he said suddenly, unable to control his temper after the exhausting week, "I don't much care what he wants. I want this job – not only would I be making much more than any grocer job, but I'd enjoy it. And I'd be good at it." He shook his head again and pushed his plate away. "Excuse me," he said, getting to his feet. He headed to his room and didn't look back.

He'd expected his mother to tell Tobias about the incident at dinner and he wasn't surprised when, two hours later, he was called down from his room.

Normally the sight of his father – still much larger than himself – intimidated him, especially when he was drunk, like he was now. But tonight it didn't faze him. Severus was tired of being bullied, tired of losing things he wanted and cared about. This possibility of a job was, really, the only thing he had left and he'd be _damned_ if his father took that away too.

"Wa's this I hear about you speakin' to your mother like that?" Tobais slurred, pointing a large finger in Severus' face.

"I'm not working at a grocer," Severus growled back. "I want to work at the apothecary."

Tobias laughed drunkenly and swayed on his feet. "Why? So you can be even more freaky than you are now? Ha! I don' think so! As long as you live un'er this roof, you'll do as I say! You'll work at the grocer. Like a normal person."

"No."

Tobias blinked stupidly. "What did you say? What did you say to me?"

"I said no. I'm not working there."

_CRACK_! Severus heard the blow before he felt it. His head spun and he staggered. But he didn't cry out, nor did he fall. He regained his balance and, trying hard to stare straight, looked up into the shocked face of Tobias. Cracking him good across the head had never failed before and, now that it had, Tobias seemed at a loss as to what to do with his son.

"Look," Eileen said, stepping forward between the two. "Look, why don't we just sleep on it? Hm? Think it over and then discuss it again in the morning?"

Tobias, still shocked that his son hadn't submitted to him, nodded mutely and allowed his wife to lead him away.

Severus grinned to himself, still fighting off stars. Feeling both pleased and rebellious, he headed to his room, determined to have something go his way for once.


	8. Chapter 8

**_A/N:_** Thanks to all my reviewers: pennypotter128, mercurywrites, Analie209, Tina95, Kyubi-female, Very Small Prophet, and Alex for reviewing

I have the anonymous reviews enabled. But, if you have a complaint (or a really long review) please log in. I like responding to my reviewers and I can't do that when you're anonymous. It's especially irksome when I get a heavy-handed review (like the one Alex gave) and I can't reply to it normally.

I'm also going to reiterate my warnings from chapter one again: **_It's very AE and, as such, Sev develops some OoC tendencies. Implied sex. Mild language. Mild violence. Implied drinking. Time jumps forward in this at no real rate._**

One last thing, I promise. I have the "official" synopsis for this story on my profile page****

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**Chapter Eight **  
**October 29 1977 **

"It's just strange, is all," Severus said cautiously, avoiding Lily's eyes as he perused the bookshelf. "I mean, Potter hasn't said two words to you so far this year. It's not like him. What's he up to?"

Lily chuckled and the sound sent chills up Severus' spine. Despite his desperate attempts (and despite her claim at the end of fifth year that she didn't have romantic feelings for him), Severus had been unable to shake his feelings for Lily. If anything, the feelings intensified.

The summer had both simultaneously dragged and rushed to an end. He'd convinced his parents to let him apply at the apothecary (he secretly thought that the only reason Tobias relented was because Severus had stood up to him, but there was no way he was going to say _that_ theory out loud). He'd gotten the job (as Jeebs had hinted he would when Severus has first talked to him during a Hogsmeade trip) so he hadn't been able to spend much time with Lily. However, as much as the isolation from his best friend had hurt, it had been nice to have some extra money on hand. For the first time in his life, Severus had been able to buy new clothes and he hadn't had to worry about there not being food on the table. It had also served to get him out of the house, away from Tobias.

On top of that, Severus loved his job. Jeebs' Apothecary was a small store, with a small inventory, and a small group of loyal clientele, but it was probably the best job Severus had ever had. Jeebs was a quiet, older man who was the only person Severus had ever met who loved potions more than him. Although his store sold the essential, common items in every apothecary, it also had a pretty nice selection of rare ingredients and, in his spare time, Jeebs brewed up some rare potions as well. More than once, Jeebs had asked for Severus' assistance in his brewing. Severus had probably learned more in the few weeks of summer than he had in seven years at Hogwarts.

"I think he's just growing up, Sev," Lily said. Although Severus couldn't see it – he was still turned away from her – he could hear the smile in her voice. "And it's about time, too."

"Yeah, or he's changed tactic," Severus muttered, reaching up above his head for the book he'd been looking for. Although last term, Potter had been more than willing to break the agreement he and Severus had made, this term he hadn't. The werewolf that had attacked the girl hadn't been caught, but Severus thought Potter' sudden change in attitude had little to do with protecting his friend and more to do with impressing Lily.

"What?"

"Nothing. C'mon, let's sit down."

Lily sighed irritably, like she'd been doing every night since the beginning of term, as she took her seat. Every night, she and Severus would meet in the library and study. They always took the table farthest from the door, the one wedged between a book case and a corner. Although Severus had never told her _exactly _what had happened the night he apologized, she had her suspicious. Suspicious that intensified when Severus stayed later and later in the library; when he sat farther and farther back; when he was the first one out of the classroom, only to duck into the bathroom and wait until the very last moment to come to class. She'd put up with his behavior last term, but this was, apparently, going to be a term of change and Lily's patience was the biggest change.

"Severus - " Lily began, but a shadow on the table cut her off. She turned her head and looked up curiously at James Potter and Sirius Black.

"Hey," Potter said softly, offering a small smile.

"Hello," Lily said cautiously. Although she and Potter had been friendly last term, Severus was here now and she wasn't exactly certain how this meeting would turn out with the two of them in such close proximity – even with James' sudden change of heart.

"Are you busy? I kind of wanted to talk to you about something . . . important."

Lily raised an eyebrow and eyed Potter speculatively. After a few moments, she came to some conclusion that satisfied her, and gave her fellow Gryffindor a faint nod. "All right," she said, rising from her chair and following him to a table a few feet away. She shot Black a stern glare over her shoulder and Severus gritted his teeth at her over protectiveness. But he let it go when something strange happened right after: Potter had given Black the same look.

Black raised his hands in submission and flopped into Lily's vacant seat. Severus eyed the boy with dislike. Potter and Black had been joined at the hip their entire school career, but it was Black, more so than Potter that Severus really hated. With his big, dark eyes, rebel grin that someone managed to be both charming and smug at the same time, and dark curly hair, Black had walked into the school and wrapped everyone (sans the Slytherins, of course) around his little finger. He seemed to pass every test with little effort and went through girls – on the rare occasion Severus actually paid attention – at a dizzying rate. And yet, he had the nerve to complain about how bad he had it. His life, if you believed Black's ranting, was utterly miserable – no one had it as bad as he did. And if anyone argued, well, that was just more proof that no one could possibly understand the utter torment of what Black supposedly went through on a day-to-day basis. It made Severus sick.

Lily gave a small laugh at something Potter said. Normally, the sound would make Severus' heart swell with happiness, but this time it made his stomach drop painfully. It was not a "you're- not- really-funny-but-I-feel-bad-or-you're-just-irritating-me-so-I'm-going-to-laugh-to-shut-you-up" laugh. This one was high and airy – a laugh of genuine pleasure. Severus glanced over at the pair and felt his heat twist; Lily seemed to be enjoying herself.

The laugh faded away, but a small smiled remained on Lily's face. She studied Potter carefully and, apparently feeling satisfied, nodded her head. Potter grinned hugely and said something that made Lily laugh again.

Black, who hadn't taken his eyes off the pair since they sat down, made a small whooping noise under his breath. "I knew you'd come around, Lils!" he exclaimed as they approached. Lily blushed faintly and Severus felt his heart stop painfully.

'_Knew you'd come around_?'

"Well, she hasn't exactly come around yet," Potter said, still grinning broadly. "She only said yes to one date."

The world stopped. There was no sound, no movement, or air. Severus felt like his chest was imploding – the oxygen had been pulled from his lungs very quickly. He couldn't breathe, think. He couldn't… It was Potter! James Potter! The man who humiliated him, embarrassed him, made fun of him, bullied him. The man whom hung him upside down in front of jeering peers. The man whom found every way to point out how painfully odd Severus – her supposed best friend – was. _This_ was the man she wanted? [i]This[/i] was her choice?

"Severus?" Lily's voice echoed dimly in his brain.

"What was all that?" he asked numbly, vaguely aware that Potter and Black were leaving.

"Well, he asked me out. He said that he really liked me and that he'd been trying to change into the man I deserved."

"And you said yes." It wasn't a question, and the statement came out harsher than Severus intended.

Lily blinked at him, obviously taken aback by his tone. "To one date."

"Unless things go well, of course."

"Well… Yes. I suppose. Even you have to admit Sev, he's different this year. There's no harm in going out on one date."

"Unless it's Potter! Merlin, Lily! You honestly think he's _changed_? He's playing you! As soon as he gets what he wants, mark my words, he'll be right back to his "old self"."

Lily blushed and narrowed her startling green eyes. "I cannot _believe_ you, Severus Snape! You know, once upon a time, people said that about _you_! And they were wrong, just like you are now!"

"That's not the same – "

"_Yes_ it _is_! It is the _exact_ same thing! You don't know him anymore than they know you. He's changed, Severus. He's completely left you and me alone all year. That counts for something."

Severus clenched his jaw and glared right back. Normally he and Lily didn't fight, but Severus refused to back down on this subject. He'd worked too hard and too long to lose Lily to Potter. "Oh, well, everything's all fine and dandy then! I'll completely forget about all the curses he's thrown at me, all the times he's humiliated me. All better!" Severus scoffed nastily.

"You know what?" Lily snarled, clenching her hands into fists. "It is _none_ of your _business_! You are _not_ my father or my brother! You have _no_ say in who I date!"

Severus bared his teeth. "I may not be your father or your brother, but I am your friend – or, at least I thought I was. My opinion _should_ matter. Especially when said date is with the biggest arse in the school!"

For a few moments they simply glared at each other. And then Lily made a frustrated noise in the back of her throat. "I thought you, of all people, would understand."

Severus jerked as if slapped. But Lily didn't notice - she'd turned on her heel and walked out. She didn't look back.

Severus wandered for a few hours after that, his head buzzing and his heart throbbing. _Potter_. James Potter. Lily would be going out with James Potter. Of all the guys she could choose from, of all the arse's she couldn't have liked, she had to pick _that_ one! He just couldn't understand it.

And then there was Potter himself, who had sworn to leave Lily alone. Sworn it to protect someone who was, supposedly, his best friend. Severus snorted in disgust. So much for loyalty. He should have known better than to take the word of a _Gryffindor_! His fists clenched.

It was almost curfew, if the darkness outside was anything to go by, Severus realized irritably as he passed by a window. He turned on his heel and stalked towards the dungeons, for once hoping that Avery wanted to pick a fight. Severus wanted to fight too. He wanted to scream, punch, kick, anything really. Anything that would get rid of this chilling darkness – that felt an awful lot like betrayal – that was seizing his heart and squeezing. Squeezing tight, choking, twisting –

Someone behind him laughed. Out of habit, Severus glanced over his shoulder. Potter and Black – again, without Lupin – were walking toward him, completely oblivious to his presence.

_Perfect_.

Severus stopped walking and just waited, crossing his arms over his chest. Eventually they'd have to notice him.

And they did. "Snivellus!" Black called cheerily, waving his arm in a mock greeting. Severus didn't respond.

"Aw," Potter said, sounding put-out. "You're not still upset about earlier are you? That thing with Lily? 'Cause, she didn't _have_ to say yes, you know – "

"We had an agreement."

Potter stopped and Black looked between them curiously. "Agreement?"

Severus nodded once. "Yes, we did. And I kept my end of the bargain. How interesting! A Slytherin being able to keep his word when a Gryffindor can't."

Potter shrugged, nonplussed. "There really wasn't a time limit. I kept my part last year."

Severus narrowed his eyes. "And that's it? Well, I guess I don't have to keep silent anymore then, either. I'm sure Dumbledore would be very interested to find out you all sneak out while Lupin's a werewolf."

Potter grinned maliciously. "You could, but it wouldn't do you any good. That's old news. Besides, you really think if Remus was guilty, Dumbledore would have just let it fly? He's a kind man, but he's got a school full of students to worry about."

Severus bared his teeth and Black laughed. "Looks like you lose, Snivellus!"

"Not hardly," Severus growled. "It's not going to take Lily long to see right through you."

The grin slipped off Potter's face. "And I bet you'd just love that, wouldn't you Snivellus? Finally get your chance to be 'her man'? Of course, you'd have to wait for her to go through every other living, straight male first – "

_BANG_!

Potter flew backwards and then up into the air, hanging upside down. He looked surprised for a moment, as if he wasn't entirely sure where he was or how he'd gotten there. Then his face cleared, and he glared at Severus. "Put. Me. Down. Now."

There was another bang and a flash of light – Severus flew backwards as well, slamming into the cold, stone wall behind him. There was a dull thud as Potter hit the floor.

Severus waved his wand instinctively, not even fully aware of what he was casting. There was another bang followed by a yelp. Severus opened his eyes just in time to see Black land heavily half-way down the hallway.

Potter jumped forward, wand suddenly at the ready, and Severus cast _Levicorpus_ at him, feeling a sense of sick satisfaction as Potter's legs were swept from under him.

"Well," was all Severus said.

"Put me down, Snivellus. Now!"

"No," Severus said airily, twirling his wand between his fingers. "No, I don't think I will."

Potter snarled and cursed and thrashed, but it did no good. Until Severus cast the counter-spell, he was stuck. Grinning to himself about this fact, Severus began heading towards the dungeons again.

"Oi! Where you going?"

"To bed," Severus called lightly over his shoulder. "I'm beat – long day you know."

Potters outraged sputters were enough to keep the grin on Severus' face long after he'd fallen asleep.


	9. Chapter 9

_**A/N:**_ As usual, thanks to all my reviewers! Sorry, I kinda lost track with all the errors FF's been having.

* * *

It had taken Severus seventeen apologies and eight promises of letting the budding relationship between Lily and Potter alone before Lily forgave him. It had taken two apologies and twenty-two promises of "I'll keep everything between us away from you" before Severus forgave her. He was not happy with the new-found romance, nor would he ever be. But Lily was happy – Merlin only knew why – and Severus didn't have it in him to keep fighting with her. Even if she had chosen Potter.

However, that hadn't stopped Potter from antagonizing Severus. And, while Severus wasn't going to go out of his way to break up the pair, he wasn't going to take Potter's pranks lying down. It seemed, after Severus' little prank, that the rivalry was back on. It just wasn't something that Lily knew about.

The first time Severus and Potter had class together was the morning after the incident in the hallway. Severus was in the back of the class, as usual, while Potter was in the front, next to Lily. While McGonagall's back was turned, Potter turned his head to the side, catching Severus' eye, and kissed Lily full on the mouth. Then, he threw Severus a smirk and faced the front.

The official story of why James Potter wound up in the hospital wing with his head transfigured into a pin was that his wrist had seized up, and the spell – meant for the hedgehog he was supposed to be transfiguring – backfired on himself. It most certainly had nothing to do with a certain enraged Slytherin in the back of the room.

Two weeks later, when Severus was forced to approach Slughorn and offer to pay to replace the three desks his exploded potion had melted, he'd explained that Archie – the Slytherin next to him – had accidentally bumped his arm while Severus was putting the liquified Mugwort in. It couldn't have been the revenge of a highly embarrassed Gryffindor Chaser.

Although Lily was highly suspicious of the sudden freak accidents that seems to suddenly befall Potter and Severus, she seemed perfectly content to believe their excuses. Or, if she did think otherwise, she kept her comments to herself.

Christmas time came quickly. As the students readied themselves for the last Hogsmeade trip before the holidays, Severus gathered his school bag and headed for the library. Lily was planning on spending the trip with Potter and co. and Severus, despite his silence against their pairing, refused to spend any more time with the ridiculous trio (Lupin wasn't going, claiming that after the recent moon cycle, he was far too tired). Lily had pouted and bribed Severus, but he steadfastly refused. After a while, Lily gave up.

The library was surprisingly full that night. Severus scrounged around for an empty seat, and found one at the same table as Regulus Black. The boy glanced up as Severus approached, but beyond that, gave no notice of Severus' arrival. It didn't really matter: Severus had given up trying to decipher the young Slytherin's strange behavior. He'd gone from watching Severus almost obsessively out of the corner of his eye, to completely ignoring the fact that he existed.

Severus pulled a worn, leather bound book – his private journal – from his bag and flipped it open to the page he'd been engrossed in all week. The page was covered in symbols, scribbles, potion names, and random doodles, which made it almost impossible to read. But the title of the entry - [i]Sectemsempra[/i] – stood out prominently.

Severus had invented the curse last year, but had yet to test it out, mostly due to the fact that whomever he tried it on would most likely die of blood loss, as Severus had not figured out how to stop the bleeding. While he fully admitted that he could be an arse, he was not a murderer, nor would he ever become one.

He sighed in frustration. He'd been working on the counter-curse for months now and had come up with nothing that would completely solve the issue. That was the problem with making your own spells – you had to make your own counter spells as well and make sure that the magic would weave together favorably. He snapped the book shut and grouchily reached into his bag for his charms homework. Might as well get something productive done.

A similar frustrated sigh from his left told Severus that he wasn't the only one having trouble with his projects. He glared next to him and saw Regulus slamming his Potions book shut with a snap. When he realized Severus was looking at him, he gestured at the offending book irritably. "I don't know how you do it – it's all gibberish to me."

Severus took the compliment with a grain of salt. "It just… comes natural, I suppose."

Regulus scoffed. "Lucky. I'm completely daft at this."

This time Severus snorted. "I doubt you're [i]that[/i] bad."

"I can't tell the difference between a diced Peanucle Trout and a slivered Eashead. I completely ruined the elixir we were working on today because I mixed them up."

"Those gave me trouble as well." Regulus eyed him skeptically. "No, really. But I realized that, most of the time, Peanucle is a dark pink color, while Eashead is a light violet."

"Right…"

Severus smiled, in spite of himself. In truth, he was kind of enjoying flaunting his intelligence. "Another way to tell them apart is to look at the tips: the Peanucle has a very narrow tip – like the end of a quill – and the Eashead has a broader tip – more like the end of an arrow."

Regulus' eyes lit with understanding. "Is that why you [i]have[/i] to dice the Peanucles every time you use them? Because they're so slim? I've always wondered why you couldn't chop or slice them. But I guess it makes sense…"

And so it continued. Regulus asked countless questions and Severus patiently answered. He took the friendliness with an ounce of suspicion; Regulus was still chummy with the Slytherins who didn't particularly like Severus. And Regulus may be friendly [i]now[/i] but that didn't mean his friendliness was even sincere. Still, though. It was nice to talk without having to worry about offending someone.

After a while, the library emptied out, leaving the two boys alone discussing Potions. And, when they ran out of Potions related topics, they switched Charms. And then Transfiguration. And then Quidditch. Severus wasn't a big Quidditch buff, but Regulus adored the sport.

"I think Slytherin's got a good chance this year, though," Regulus said happily, twirling a quill between his fingers. "Our teams better than it ever was, and we've been training really hard."

Severus smiled wanly. As much as he enjoyed talking with Regulus, the talk of Quidditch had reminded him that this conversation was never going to happen again. Severus was still the outcast, the misfit, while Regulus was the budding Quidditch player who was mates with the people responsible for Severus' ostracization. He highly doubted that Regulus would want to be seen being so chummy in the common room, or even anywhere else. And, anyway, Avery would find a way to put a stop to it if he did.

As if on cue, Regulus' face went blank, and he turned away from Severus.

"Hey," a voice said from behind him. Severus turned and faced Lily, her face flushed from the cold, her expression bewildered as she glanced back and forth between her friend and the youngest Black.

"I've been looking for you. The feast is about to start."

Severus gave a sharp nod. "Okay. Sorry. I lost track of time." He gathered his things up and followed her out of the library, trying very hard not to look back.


End file.
